I had a "happy accident" with my film this week. I think the lab cross processed my film and I am in love with what it did to these shots.
Don't you just wish you could stay at this bed and breakfast? Well you can't because it's my house… But if you really want to come visit you can, and I would totally make you a fancy breakfast and serve it on my favorite blue and white dishes.
I can't decide which one is my favorite. What do you think?
I am preparing for one of many trips to Bear Lake, Utah, but this year not with my family, but my new husband's family. It's been a couple years since I've been and as I've been looking through some old film I realize so much of my film is from this place. I love it. I love staying at brother-in-law's family farm; hearing the cows, waking up to the sun, taking walks to the cemetery and down along the fields, and spending all day at the beach. I love this place and I love this film.
Here are some random photos from my all time favorite Kodak Tri-x film. I used to shoot with this film exclusively.
I love resdiscovering old film! It's like Christmas, or like reliving the day you got said film the first time in the mail that felt like Christmas.
I know these aren't particularly noteworthy but they are from when I went to Alaska. and look how young Syd is. And I love when my holga camera gives me these unexpected results that are nothing I ever tried to achieve, but I love them anyway. (see bottom photo)
Can we be done with winter yet...? Aside from being cold all the time, the other worst thing about winter is not being able to find shoes adequate for winter.
This is hard for me to admit. Maybe I have "cankles"..... I don't think I do because I have a definite shape from my calve to my ankle to my feet. But finding boots that fit my ginormous calves has been impossible. Usually I just try to skip over winter and wearing boots, by wearing slippers everywhere. But I tried on a lot of boots this year. :( I'm still wearing slippers to work.
I prefer the term, so kindly given by one of my brothers friends back in high school, "rugby calves."
It's hard to admit he was right but it feels better than "cankles."
I hate pastel colors. And honestly, that is the only reason I don't like Easter. Silly right? It's just all pinks and baby blues and cutesiness. But I do love dying eggs, especially when you can get really bold and dark colors like these. This is my favorite green right now.
Here are some old photos from, oh ya know, two years ago.... :)
Someday.... Someday I will have mulled through everything. If only I could stop taking pictures long enough to get caught up.
Back in October (last year... yeah, LAST YEAR!) I was so privileged to photograph at Run for Congo Women 2012. I've participated in events and volunteered in the past for Utah for Congo but this time I was able to just watch, observe, and document everything. It was pretty amazing and I feel very lucky I got to be a part of it. I'm so grateful to Lindsay Park and Missy Lambert for "roping" me into this. :) hehe I've learned so much about the conflict in the Congo and the cause these women fight for.
I just finished my Personality Theory class at Salt Lake Community College. I don't know why but I kindy want to share my final. Nerdy, right...? I'm a huge nerd!
I presented my final in the form of a painting/photo slideshow, with an explanatory paper.
I guess I'm a tiny bit excited about art therapy.... :) Okay, I'm really excited to do more stuff like this.
Here is the video:
and here is part of the paper: (in case anyone actually has that kind of time on their hands to read someone's final paper)
To begin to understand
personality I organized the traits perspective combined with biological,
genetic, and inherited perspectives, where traits are inherent at birth and
exist and play a crucial role throughout our lives as they interact with other
theories at different stages. These traits also include dispositions and
tendencies that each individual has. For example a person with a disposition to
be pessimistic will tend to see the glass as half empty in various situations
as they move throughout their life.
With our inherent traits we move
into the psychosocial perspective, which includes Erickson’s developmental
stages and attachment theory as well as our environment, interaction with the
world, and the crises in our lives and how we internalize and interpret our
experiences. We see the interplay between our traits and our experiences as we
enter each new developmental stage of life. Each developmental stage also influences
how we view our world and experiences and affects our behavior and ultimately
our personality. Also introduced at this point is the learning perspective
where we learn what is expected of us in society and find the balance between
our nature and what is socially acceptable. In this stage, as a result of much
gathered information throughout our lives, we develop scripts and schemas about
ourselves. We use our experiences to create beliefs and more broadly define who
we are or our perceived self image and also begin to compare our self image
with our ideal self.
Lastly we take a look at self
actualization and self determination. As
Maslow states we all have a desire to improve as people and achieve our ideal
self, becoming a “fully functioning person.” As a part of self actualization we
use the cognitive perspective and self-regulation. We utilize such tools as the
hierarchical feedback system and negative feedback loop described within the
self-regulation perspective, where we set goals to achieve our ideal self and
reevaluate outcomes, making adjustments along the way.
I don’t mention psychoanalysis in
any one group of perspectives because psychoanalysis is a constant factor that
plays a role in our personality through all the other perspectives and is too
complex to group into one category. However, psychoanalysis and the ongoing
push and pull between id and ego is ever present in every stage and group of
factors that contribute to personality as we learn to work towards self actualization and the ultimate balance between id and
ego where two components work together. I felt that in painting my perspective
it would be a perfect way to exemplify the ever present and ongoing yet sometimes
intangible element of psychoanalysis throughout our entire exploration of
personality. Creating the art served as a process of continuous exploration and
discovery and similar to that of becoming conscious in psychoanalysis as well
as symbolizes the complexity of the relationship between ego and id and the
layering consciousness.
In painting my perspective I also
wanted to explore personality theory as it relates to me, illustrating my own
inherent traits, dispositions and tendencies, pinpointing my own schemas and
scripts that I have patterned my self-image after. I wanted to illustrate my own
desire to achieve my ideal self and the steps towards self actualization, while
accepting that I still have the same dispositions and tendencies that I did as
a child. In doing this I realized that part of self actualization is accepting
what is and being in process of self actualizing, rather than self
actualization as an end goal. We have moments of self actualization but we can
keep progressing and learning because we are constantly moving through
different stages and having different experiences.
Personality can be described as a combination of the three groups of theories, traits, psychosocial and self
actualization, that work together and the process of moving in and out of focus
as we see our personalities evolve. Although this seems to illustrate a process
that our personality evolves as we grow, each of these groups influences our
personality simultaneously. Each aspect of personality is in effect at
different times and at the same time. Each group explained contributes to one’s
personality in an individualized way, depending on inherent dispositions
situations, context, perception, stage in life, and past and current
experiences and determination to improve and grow as a person.
I am going to unabashedly brag, not because I think I am especially worthy of bragging or anything, but because I have been working my tush off for the last two weeks on grad school applications. And I'm a tiny bit proud of myself.
A part of the applications is an art portfolio. I decided this would be a good time to share some recent photos mingled with some of my art from recent art classes, and old photos from my photo program at the University of Utah, in the form of my portfolio.
(I mostly want to show off my recent photos but yer gettin' it all!)
I am in serious need of some TLC. I'm thinking sleep and.... I can't think of anything else... hahahah!
what does one do to relax these days? I'm taking suggestions.
I don't really "love" when it starts to get colder outside...... In fact
I really kinda, hate being cold. I'm still wearing my flip fops.....
okay?! But I do LOVE knitting! And cold weather always makes me want to
get my knit on....
